Story by Mercy Chloe and Photos by Ian Obadha
“Daddy, where is mummy and when will she be back? Is she going to be okay?”
Even today, those questions from his children bring tears to Paul Otieno’s eyes. They were simple questions asked by young children trying to understand why their mother was spending so much time in hospital. But for Paul, they carried the weight of a reality he was struggling to face himself.
As the world marks Cancer Survivor Month, many survivors reflect on their battles with the disease. Yet behind every survivor is often a caregiver whose life is equally transformed by the diagnosis. For Paul, the past two years have been defined by fear, uncertainty, sacrifice, and ultimately hope.
His family’s life changed dramatically when his wife, Wilkister Akinyi, was diagnosed with Stage Two breast cancer. The diagnosis came at a particularly difficult time. Paul had already lost his job and was struggling to provide for his family. Suddenly, they were confronted with a disease widely associated with expensive treatment, prolonged hospital visits, and an uncertain future.
“It felt like our lives had come to a standstill,” he recalls. “I was already worried about how to support my family, then we received news that completely changed everything.”
While Wilkister began treatment, Paul found himself taking on responsibilities he had never imagined. He became not only a husband and caregiver but also the emotional pillar of the family. Though overwhelmed by fear and uncertainty, he knew he had to remain strong for his wife and children.
“There were days I felt completely defeated, but I could not show it. My family was looking to me for strength.”
The journey became even more difficult as treatment began to take a visible toll on his wife. The woman who had confidently run her salon business and actively engaged with her community was suddenly fighting fatigue, weight loss, and hair loss caused by treatment.
“Her appearance changed completely. Watching that happen was very painful because I knew how active and independent she had always been,” he says.
Financial challenges soon followed. The family struggled to meet treatment costs while also paying school fees and household expenses. At times, the pressure felt overwhelming. Paul recalls moments when his children were sent home from school due to unpaid fees, adding another layer of stress to an already difficult situation.
Support came from relatives, friends, church members, and healthcare workers who stood by the family during some of their darkest moments. He particularly remembers the reassurance they received from doctors at Jaramogi Oginga Odinga Teaching and Referral Hospital (JOOTRH), who encouraged them throughout the treatment process and gave them confidence that recovery was possible.
That encouragement helped them remain focused on the long road ahead.
Paul believes caregivers often carry a hidden burden. While much attention is rightly given to patients, caregivers also experience fear, anxiety, emotional exhaustion, and financial strain. Yet many suffer silently as they try to balance supporting their loved ones while holding their families together.
“There are many people taking care of cancer patients who are hurting inside but do not know where to turn for support,” he says.
Today, Wilkister is a cancer survivor. As the family celebrates this milestone, Paul reflects on the journey with gratitude and pride. He celebrates his wife’s determination, the support they received from healthcare workers, family, and friends, and the resilience that carried them through some of the most challenging moments of their lives.
As he joins other survivors and caregivers in commemorating cancer survivorship, Paul hopes their story will encourage families currently facing similar battles. His message is simple: no one should face cancer alone.
For Paul, the tears that once came from fear and uncertainty have gradually been replaced by tears of joy—a reminder of how far his family has come and the strength they discovered along the way.
